last night i wrote my obituary . today it took me half an hour to find the dictionary to spell the damn word . the dictionary was lodged under a pile of notebooks undone things bills three cd's and two place matts all balanced on the corner of my desk on top of the printer that only works when it wants to.
when i say i wrote it well i constructed it in my head how i wanted it to sound, how i would like people to remember me. biggest thing that came out of it is that the avi picture you see isnt me anymore. no i havent grown another head or anything too drastic it's just not me not now. i suppose people remember what they want to and forget the bits they dont. you cant tell people what to think or how to feel or what to remember they just will do whatever they want to. id rather be forgotten, just slide me under the radar and leave me there.
anywho my toes are numb i am wearing the big shoes with the holes in them as opposed to the boots that flat and have holes in them and bedsocks and i have to go and get a small child soon and shop . i dont want to i want to go back to bed and disappear but i wont. normal face on for the masses and off we go. it may snow i may get run over by a bus . my underwear is awful saggy and doesnt match i dont care.
someone remind me i need to get milk and fill the gas meter before the whole of pants palace dies of the cold.
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